Asked by Anonymous
When I was walking downtown, a lady bum asked me for some money. I offered to give her a compliment, instead. She said, “If you think it’s better than money…” But in a way that was more like, “Just give me a dollar because your words can’t feed me.” Which is true. But I didn’t have a dollar with me, so I said, “Of course it is. Because you’ll have this compliment forever!” Turns out she would have preferred the money and does not share the same feelings for these compliments as you do. Also, she walked away from me. True story. Sadly.
Asked by itsmyblogandstuff
This one time, I was at a baseball game, and I saw Martin Starr. And I was like, “Martin Starr!” So random. Also, thanks for the follow.
Asked by reality-portal-deactivated20120
Well, no. I only take topic suggestions, not full compliments. But I’ll let this one slide, just this once. Way off topic, how cool are Slip N’ Slides. The best, right? I know.
Asked by polarjelly-deactivated20120522
Well, now that we’re best friends, maybe I can turn those caterpillars into butterflies. If not, that’s okay. It’s probably unsafe, anyways.
Asked by twinkjolras-deactivated20130909
Thanks, but I’m not perfect. I have flaws, just like everybody else. For instance, I can’t juggle more than three objects at once. Also, I’m addicted to chapstick. Don’t look at me. I’m so ashamed…
Asked by funsizenightmare
Vegas? C’mon. Who do you think you’re talking to here? If we’re gonna get married, we’re gonna do it right. Like under a waterfall, inside a pyramid, but outside, underneath the stars. Don’t worry, I know a guy.
Asked by annie--waits
Sure. But what does age have to do with prom? Oh. Wait a second. I see what’s going on here. Okay. I follow now. Yeah, I’ll go to “Prom” with you. And I’ll make sure to bring a “corsage.” Lubricated, of course.